Showing posts with label Memorial Day. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Memorial Day. Show all posts

Sunday, May 27, 2012

Memorial Day 2012: Here's To The Dead, Not The Ratings And Poll Grabbing Undead

Happy Memorial Day from IWS!!

Okay wait…um…

Somber Memorial Day from IWS!?

Neither salutation seems to fit, um…

Anyhoo, it is Memorial Day, and millions of Americans across our great nation are celebrating this day in the form of can’t miss Sealy Mattress Sales, drunken cookouts, and watching septuagenarian Shriners drive around in tiny, tiny cars on Main Street U.S.A.

It’s the one day a year when, barring a new war, that Lee Greenwood gets some of his long lost fame, and relevance back, and actually gets some air play outside the mothball smelling stages of Branson, MO.

Do I sound bitter about Memorial Day and our Armed Forces?  Do I sound as though I am some suffering bowl of Liberal succotash?  Do I sound like an anti-military hater?

Well my friends…I am not.  Not in the least.

Hell, in 1987 I tried to enlist into the Air Force and was stricken down by an unwillingness on the government’s behalf of accepting a 22 year old man who was nearly legally blind and had a case of bronchitis into their armed services.  Petty fuckers.

Indeed, some see me as some type of Liberal Chucklehead who hates the military, and wants nothing to do with it to the point where I hate Memorial Day.

You know what I would like to say to people like that?

“Y’all can kiss my red, white, and blue ass, bend down and suck my Manifest Destiny dick, and go self-asphyxiate your own, sunshine patriot asses, because I am a REAL American, and I know what Memorial Day is all about.”

Memorial Day began as a day to honor the dead who fought in the Civil War, and then grew to a day where we, as Americans, honor the dead of every war in which this nation has offered her men and women.

And now?

Ever since 9/11, EVERY fucking day consists of a “thank you for your service“, “let’s honor the men and women who serve”, and “thank you for defending us” type of thing from every radio and TV outlet and host in this nation.

Those words have become meaningless, and today, Memorial Day 2012 we will hear those empty, ratings, and poll approving words said yet again, in an attempt by each cable network and candidate trying to prove that THEY are the most patriotic.  Ha…

FOX News doesn’t give a shit.  No politician gives a shit.  Most Americans don’t give a shit.

FOX News will fly the flag above a LIVE soldier. A Politician will shake the hand of a LIVE soldier, and the rest of America will shake the hand of LIVE family member or neighbor as they cook burgers on the grill.

Sadly…that is what media, political, and neighborly types think of Memorial Day these days.

Let me say to all of you…

FOX NEWS?  Memorial Day is about the fallen soldiers, not the ones that you use in order to make yourselves look like you care.

Candidates?  Having a picture taken of yourself with a drunken crew from the VFW 1068 on Memorial Day doesn’t make you more of a candidate.

And Americans?

If you spend your day cooking out with friends and family, you are closer to what this day is about than the other freaks.

You are celebrating the right to assemble.  The right to happiness.  The right to get as drunk as you want and fall into a grill as long as others aren’t hurt.

That is what those who gave all died for, and THAT is what this day is about.

It’s not about anybody and everybody who has served or will serve, it is about those marvelous bastards and bitches who left it all on the field of battle.

It is a day for the dead, so that we may live.

Cheers!!
Matt-Man
neshobadude@yahoo.com
@mattmaniws

Annnnnd….Jayman and I kicked off Summer yesterday with one helluva good IWS Radio Show.  We talked cookouts, Memorial Day, and Jay’s Family Reunion, it was a hoot, so check it out:


Friday, May 25, 2012

Matt Said...Jay Said XL

Matt titkellem ... Jay titkellem; inti tisma.

(via Twitter)

Jay:  No show prep phone call this week…all of my family is coming in for a big reunion this weekend.
Matt:  Uh-huh…Are you sure that’s all that is going on here?
Jay:  Yeah, why?
Matt:  Perhaps you are really avoiding our weekly call because you are cracking wise with somebody else?
Jay:  No.  I swear.
Matt:  Okay.
Jay:  How could I do that to you and your fragile ego?
Matt:  Damn right, wait…wh--

Jay:  Anyhoo.  Since I’ll be tied up with family all weekend, we need to do a show that requires very little show prep.
Matt:  The Many Sides of Mitt Romney?
Jay:  Ha…that would take forever with all the sides he has, has had, and will have.
Matt:  True.
Jay:  How about The Rachel Maddow Show…Love Her or Hate Her?
Matt:  TOO easy.
Jay and Matt:  HATE HER!!

Matt:  Memorial Day Weekend is this weekend.  We could do something on that.
Jay:  We could kick-off the unofficial start to summer with hot weather tips and shit.
Matt:  Cool.  We could do grilling and cookout tips.
Jay:  Since I will be in the midst of one, talk about family reunions.
Matt:  Indeed…We could talk about the scantily clad women in their summer fashions.
Jay:  Which you see even more of at typical vacation destinations.

Matt:  I think we’re set.
Jay:  Oh I know we are.
Matt:  Hey?
Jay:  What?

Matt:  Did you say that you are holding your big family reunion in Yellville, AR?
Jay:  Yeah why?
Matt:  That’s not a real city is it?
Jay:  Well, it’s not a city; it’s tiny, but that is the official name of the burg in which my family and I will be partying away.
Matt:  Ha…That’s funny.
Jay:  Oh it’s a cool little place.  You should bring Schmoop down sometime for the annual Turkey Trot Festival.  Bring the wife and kid too.
Matt:  Oh you’re a funny fucker, aren’t ya?
Jay:  Hee Hee.  Sometimes.

Matt:  Okay.  I think we’re good to go.  See you on IWS Radio this Sunday at Noon ET, Jayman.
Jay:  We’ll be kicking off summer through the goal posts of life.
Matt:  True Dat.