Why White Chicks Rule...A Webuttal

Gweetings and Zǎo Shàng Hǎo most wespected weaders of I’m With Stupid.

Dim Sum Woks here.

I am official Asian Dude of Indeterminate Nationality of IWS, and I have most deep and pwofound webuttal of Jayman’s post, Why Asian Chicks Rule. (Rule?  Funny spellring, ask Matt-Man about.)

Ret me say it wight here and now...Asian Chicks, No Wule. HA-ho.

Jayman say Asian chicks are substantive.  It no can be for Asian chick to be substantive when rivving on diet of wice and bok choy.  Skinny Asian girl bro in wind rike a fousand wipples acwoss angwy rake.  HA-ho.

White girl stay anchored to ground.  White girl body fed with gwain and beef.  White girl body full of curves and soft, cushy rayers of sexiness and carbohydwates.  Dim ruv cushiness of white girl.  HA-ho.

Jayman say Asian chicks are foughtful and considerwate…Jayman never spend one night in Bangkok wif Thai hooker.

Even the innocent rooking teenage hookers reave one with nothing but heartache, empty pockets, and a scwotum full of bed bugs. HA-ho.  Dim no likey.  White chicks however…

They aim to prease.  Sometimes, white chicks want to film the fun without ever asking for money, all the while praying joyful game they call, Brackmail!!  HA-ho.

Jayman call Asian chicks, “exotic.”  Dim no think Asian chick exotic, unress one is carnival barker wanting to open circus with chicks who rook rike chopsticks.  White chicks?  Dim find them mooooost exotic.

White chicks have big wound eyes…Big wound bottoms…and big wound boobies.  Jayman pwobably think Mt. Everwest is exotic, why he no rikey Everwest sized boobies?  HA-ho.

Jayman craim that White chicks hate Asian chicks.  Well?  White chicks should hate Asian chicks.

Asian chicks alrays be talking smack behind their backs in Korean, Mandarin, or Lao whenever a white chick is having a manicure, a pedicure, or their sheets turned down by Taiwanese hotel maid.

White chicks speak upfwont, with no secwets.  White chicks rike to say to man, “We need to talk.”  White chicks rike to talk and not hide feerings.  White chicks verwy verwy crear about feerings. HA-ho.

Jayman espouse virtue of Asian chicks being funny.  Asian chicks no funny.  Asian chicks alrays mysterwious and intwospective rike Twansylvanian gypsy.  They see nothing but groom and doom.

White chicks ALRAYS super happy and super funny.  White chicks say to Dim, “Is that the Communist Manifesto in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?”

When Dim hears that, Dim alrays ROR….White chicks cwack me up.  HA-ho.

Rastry…Jayman say Asian chicks are ruving and accepting…Nothing could be further fwom the truth.

Asian chicks just expwess their ruv so they can get out of the wice paddies and into a dwy home.  I understand not wanting to spend day in Bangann Wice Terrwaces, but they should be upfwont about it.

White chicks are not rike that.  White chicks say upfwont:

“I’m 49 years old, never married, and I may have forgotten to take my birth control pill.  I love you long time.”

Dim rike gusto and courwage of white chicks.

White chicks Wuuuuuuule!!  HA-Ho.

And then again my fwiends…Dim not compretely dissing Asian chicks, after all…

If Dim find White chicks super happy and hot, Dim rikes…

Cauc-ASIANS!!

HA-ho...

Mai mốt gặp lại,

Dim Sum Woks

neshobadude@yahoo.com
@mattmaniws